Destructive to Constructive
“Ponder for a moment, what a shadow is, a space without light,
– Denise Vargas
presence in absence, the shape of anything but itself…“
Being a shadow, was always a favorite of mine. You could be a tree for a day and have people enjoy your shade, to follow a master’s steps without worrying to make your own mistakes. A presence in absence, a rare opportunity to be and not equally. Yes, a space without light but not without soul, like Khayyam’s clay cups wherein its empty space is where that liquid of life is poured. How easily can a shadow, dark, absent, silent be a negative that can define without life, without future? How we can take our daily curve balls life throws as punishment instead of teaching. Where do we decide to separate emotions of hardships with constructive solutions? To take away the self-pity, and loathe coloring it with a rhythm that makes us dance.
We have broken the camel’s back, halfway into the course. We are all a family now – Tara, Greg, Estephania, Fayaz, Yasmeen, Iason, Taha, Ahmad and I, all living in a castle filled with unconditional fresh tastes of France’s meadows and farms surrounded by grass, lakes, and trees that were drawn only in our fairytales. The birds’ harmony wakes us as the sun guides us on our morning walks or runs. I have never run as much as I have here, and I can keep running. When will I next be able to experience such life and presence? My senses had heightened from Zagros and now shaped into a particular sharpness amongst everyone’s human stories, tears, and literature.
Our talks and readings will soon move towards machines and artificial intelligence, subjects that bring a worry to the ends of my stomach. There is a fear that sits there, why, I can’t yet place. For now, I will keep looking out the windows onto the fields, I can breathe easier.